Birds and Bees Don't Make Sense
by Zebras
Summary: Birds and bees really don't make sense when poor Naruto and Sasuke are trying to have a baby, due to a lucky fluke in the Uchiha bloodline. After numerous tries, will they finally have the baby that they wished for? NaruxSasu.AU.OOC.MPreg. T for language.
1. Lovely

Another fic. Kill me. I need to stop. But if I don't start it I'll forget it. Forgive me D:

I'm really hoping to get better on the longer chapters and all. I think this will be my longest yet. And right after this I'll try and update Sapphire at least. Lost all my data TwT

Warnings:: Fairly unexplained Mpreg, dis boi lykes anudder boii, AU, OOC, Big. Fat. Time skips.

All your average warnings for a noob fic.

But hey, the more you try, the more you learn, the better you get.

**B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E **

**When your trying to have a baby with your boyfriend.**

A loud yawn illuminated the silence in a bedroom followed by a groan when the two boys were awakened by the radio announcer's voice filtered through their alarm clock.

"-nday morning! I'm your host Hiragi until the afternoon. It's about Seven A.M. so now is about time to start getting ready for work and school. Bummer! So here's a pick me up song, Cherry Lips!"() The cheery voice exclaimed through the black radio. Sasuke groaned again and shoved his head under the navy blue pillow.

"'Don' wan' a pick m' up song.." he half mumbled tiredly. Naruto chuckled next to him. He threw the blanket off of himself which landed even more bundled on top of his lover. His bare feet touched the floor and he yawned again. Looking down he vaguely noticed the remnants of their last night activities on his stomach and smiled. What started with Naruto hogging all the covers, which Sasuke commented with 'stop being such a baby.' And that lead to a 'speaking of babies..' comment and..well-... you know.

The blonde's boyfriend was actually quite unique. Like some of the other younger men in their family. He was fully able to bear a child of his own. Which would sound strange to someone who didn't know the Uchiha family. And that was rare with them being one of the richest families in Konoha. When the women's strength to carry deteriorated after a while the Uchiha's feared an end to any future population. But an odd hope came from one of the earlier son's sexual preference. He and his lover discovered after a month of a 'stomach flu' it was time to see a doctor. When they went in, needless to say the woman was in shock. They were hesitantly informed that they should be expecting a child. Mixed with happiness and confusion they broke the hopefully good news to the family.

Naruto smiled and walked towards the bathroom, stark naked and bobbing his head to the cheerful melody of the song.

"Mm. Walk slower." Sasuke said tiredly. Naruto turned around and started walking backwards. The Uchiha smiled and stared through half lidded eyes, while his head hovered above his folded arms. Naruto smiled and stepped a grapevine into the bathroom. He grabbed a towel from underneath the sink and set it on the counter. He briefly checked the mirror to notice a splotch of his hair was sticking straight up, obviously defying gravity. He chuckled, remembering that's where one of Sasuke's hands were clutching last night.

Naruto turned the dial on the shower to a burning temperature before reaching towards the other and turning it up, making the water colder. He stepped inside the tub and closed the curtain before yanking the knob on the faucet upwards queing the spray. He almost squeaked when it started cold, but it quickly blended into the warm temperature he had previously set. Grabbing the blue shampoo bottle and squeezing a fair amount into his hand before scrubbing it through his damp blond hair. He dipped his dead under the spray rinsing the suds out of his locks.

The curtains gave a ring and a ruffle as Sasuke stepped inside the tub before pulling them back towards the wall. He smiled and took the body wash from where it was beside the shampoo. Naruto smiled back before turning away from him and facing the faucet and shower head. Sasuke poured a little into his hands and started to massage it into Naruto's back. He smiled at their daily routine and how it never got old. He absently rubbed the sudsy foam over his boyfriends back as he sighed in content.

"When are-"

"I already made the appointment." Sasuke cut him off. Naruto turned his head slightly to indicate that he was listening.

"Tsudane said she would see me in a few weeks." He said in monotone. Naruto frowned. Sasuke obviously wasn't sounding to hopeful. But he couldn't really blame him. After countless visits to the old hag only to receive the unfortunate news was wearing on him. After the first few visits, Sasuke just started going alone since Naruto was missing far too many days of teaching. And after every appointment Sasuke would call Naruto on the schools phone just to tell the blonde of the bad news.

"Sasuke, don't worry. We'll have a kid in no time." He turned around and smiled sadly. "this time will be different, alright?" He gently placed his hands on Sasuke's shoulders and gave them a reassuring squeeze. Sasuke shook his head lightly.

"That's what you say every time! 'It will happen', 'We'll keep trying., 'Don't worry.'! Well I do worry Naruto!" His eyebrows furrowed as he continued. "We've tried so many times to have a baby and nothing has changed. I'm so sick of getting the same answer over and over again. Just one time I want her to walk back in and say 'Hey! You're pregnant!' instead of just shaking her fucking head an-" Sasuke couldn't say much more as pale pink lips covered his own, silencing him.

Naruto pulled away and smiled sadly again. "Please don't say that Sasuke. It will happen. I promise. And you know how I feel about making promises." He leaned forward and placed another light kiss on Sasuke's temple.

"Yeah I know. You always say that.." Sasuke murmured. Naruto grinned, instantly lightening the mood.

"Good! Then I have to get ready, and you need to get un-smelly." He wrinkled his nose playfully and Sasuke laughed and shoved him out of the tub. He grabbed the towel on the counter and wrapped it loosely around his waist. He walked to the closet, shuffling around while throwing boxers, jeans and socks onto his bed. A plain black tie flew after them next, landing on the bed and draping off and slightly touching the floor. Now came the harm part of his morning. He groaned and sifted through the many dress shirts above him. He sighed, not feeling like wearing any sort of blue. It made him feel gloomy. And red just didn't seem right on Monday. Bad vibes. Purple? The dark violet screamed gay, which was fine..but blue and red made purple. He groaned again and rubbed his forehead.

"Yellow." A voice said right outside of their walk-in closet. He turned to Sasuke who was wearing a loose towel around his waist and leaning lazily against the doorway.

"Huh?" Naruto replied smartly.

"You want to wear yellow today." Sasuke said grabbing a pair of boxers and the sweatpants that were right next to them. He turned around and walked back into the room with the clothes in hand. Naruto smiled and plucked out a goldenrod shirt from the rack. He really did want to wear yellow today. Naruto walked out of his closet and to his disappointment Sasuke was dressed in his sweatpants and already drying his hair. He dropped his towel and started getting dressed, very aware of Sasuke's stare a few feet away. He slid into his boxers, a great deal to the mental protest of his boyfriend which he followed with a pair of slightly ragged jeans, because slacks were made for super special occasions, like dates with Sasuke. The deep yellow shirt went on passed his arms and he started to button it from the bottom up.

Sasuke grabbed the plain black tie off the bed and wrapped it around Naruto's collar while he was finishing up the last buttons. The brunette did the knot quickly and adjusting it to the right length before pulling the collar over it. He smiled at his mild handiwork as he smoothed it out slightly. Naruto smiled and wrapped his arms around Sasuke's waist. He gave a brief kiss on his lover's lips and grinned.

"I love you."

"And I love you, too."

**B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E**

Naruto walked through the hall to his classroom. He sighed and stuck the small gold key in the door, unlocking it and walking in. He fumbled to find the light switch for a moment before the room brightened.

He walked over to the desk nearest to the door and straightened it to face forward. Someone must have hit it in a hurry to get home. His feet shuffled slightly against the hardwood floor as he made his way over to the neat oak desk. A classic 'Number 1 Teacher!' mug sat at the front holding various pens that he and even his students used. To the left of his desk he had three photos that all had the same simple black frame. One had him and Sasuke sitting on the park bench together, Naruto's arm around Sasuke's shoulder and their hands grasped together. They were both smiling as Sakura took the picture. Another was of the two of them again, and Naruto was holding the camera a little bit from their faces. The blonde had his lips planted on Sasuke's cheek while his eyes held the camera's view. Sasuke himself had his eye closed at the unexpected kiss and his mouth open in a laugh.

The third was of him and all of his friends for Naruto's graduation party right after he got his teaching degree. The all had huge smiles on their faces, especially Naruto himself with his arms around Sakura and Sasuke's shoulders. The rest of his friends were scattered amongst the picture.

Naruto actually had another black frame in the back of his desk drawer. He was saving it for one last photo that would sit closest to him while he graded papers and for anyone to see. The one would hold Sasuke and himself at their wedding. They both had wanted to wait for their child to be there in the ceremony. If it was a boy, like they wished for, then he would be the ring bearer while Sakura and Lee's daughter, Yuki, would hopefully be the flower girl. He was about to reach down and look if the blank frame was there when a tap on his desk where a brown cup was placed in front of him, some logo on the front of it.

"You've been spacin' out, Boss." A voice said above him. He smiled up at Konohamaru. His personal teacher's assistant. He had actually met the boy when he first started, apparently a trouble maker doing some community service. He liked the boy right away, noticing a little of his younger self in him. Since then, Konohamaru had changed, having a job on the side of working for the school. His service ended about a year ago, but nobody seemed to mind that he stuck around. The principal also deciding to pay him for helping the school and giving him a job, he was even more urged to stay. Being a college dropout landed him into bad company and an even worse name with a record. But he seemed to have changed greatly since he had heard what the younger used to do. He was just about nineteen. Only about five years younger than Naruto himself.

"Seems your mind is on vacation. You get Sasuke knocked up yet?" Konohamaru said as he smirked around his own cup of coffee. Naruto sighed and shook his head.

"You ask me the same question every time you come in. The answer is still the same 'Maru." He picked up the brown cup and leaned back in his chair, sipping at it lightly. He savored the taste of the white chocolate mint ever since Konohamaru brought it to him the first time. He absently blew a bit of hair out of his vision and decided to look at the clock on the wall. He frowned and turned to his assistant, far too lazy to read the time on a clock that wasn't digital.

"What time is it?" He mumbled over the lip of the coffee cup. Konohamaru rolled his eyes and looked at the watch around his wrist.

"About ten minutes 'til hell."

"Lovely.." He smiled and took another drink of the mocha.

**B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E**

I am thoroughly proud of myself. I believe this is my longest chapter of anything. Ever.

I made double sure that it was longer than Rewind Reset.

Five pages, booooyeeee.

So ha…

Next chapter is a time skip adventure.

Also we meet Naruto's class. Joyous, no?

Please review. Criticism isn't taken well, but **wonderfully** accepted.

Flames will be eaten to start off my future 'Fire Eater' career.

Cool Beans.


	2. You're Not Wearing A Tie

Second chapter. Mmyes?

Mwa haha.

**Nuts::** Song in the last chapter was Cherry Lips by Garbage. Fun song.

And remember the SUPER OOC FAIRY has blessed this chapter, again.

**LOTS OF THANKS** to all my Favors, Subscribers, and certainly, Reviewers. You guys make my day. :D

**Special Thanks To**::_nymphadora1982_. I couldn't finish this without her. She gave me Itachi's husband! Yes, HUSBAND. He's married. I would've never thought of it. : )

That's dandy and all, **but I need your help**.

What is their babies name? Yeah Naruto and Sasuke's. So if you review, just send me a little PS telling me a boy, girl, or both names. I prefer them not to be Arashi, or American names. Like Jake and Bob. :/

I already have Itachi all planned out. : )

Let us begin, no?

**. B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E .**

**When a prank goes amazingly well**

_Two and a half weeks later.._

Today was a Wednesday, Naruto mentally reminded himself. Today was the day where everything would be slow and agonizing. That was because today was Sasuke's appointment.

Their morning routine went through silently. Naruto took his shower alone and washed his own back sluggishly. Sasuke didn't even get out of bed when the radio went off with a cheerful melody, which was silenced before the next beat.

Naruto sighed and turned his head down away from the spray. He fumbled slightly with the dials of the bathtub before the slightly scalding water turned off. He reached out onto the counter and grabbed his towel half-heartedly. It slid carelessly to the floor after his attempt to grab it. Naruto reached down and grabbed it, not even sparing it the frustration while droplets of water puddled from his hair onto the floor.

He slid the towel around his waist lightly and walked out of the bathroom, steam trailing him slightly before dissipating behind him. His feet scraped against the floor when he grabbed the first things he saw out of the closet. Ragged jeans and a blue dress shirt next to his ankle socks and boxers. He shrugged awkwardly as he left a tie behind in the closet.

Not wearing a tie followed Sasuke's appointment days. Every morning his lover did the knot for him and lightly laid the collar down over it. Naruto had asked him at least a million times to teach him, but Sasuke always refused, saying how much he loved to do it for him. Naruto just explained to him that it was a perfectly good excuse to kiss him.

He dressed himself slowly while directing his stare Sasuke's still form that was still in bed/ He was facing the wall with knees pulled up slightly higher than usual. His breaths were a little uneven, signaling that he was awake. He fastened the button near his neck and smoothed out the wrinkles on his shirt.

He smiled sadly as he sat down on their bed. Sasuke didn't move his eye from the wall even when Naruto placed his hand on his shoulder and rubbed it gently.

"I'm gonna go to the school, alright?" Naruto said quietly. Sasuke nodded lightly, his eyes trained on the wall. "Remember to call."

Sasuke turned from the wall and looked at Naruto. The blonde gave his best smile in the given situation and mood. But it made Sasuke read his hand up to the wall and looked at Naruto. The blonde gave his best smile in the given situation and mood. But it made Sasuke reach his hand up to lightly lead Naruto's head down to give him a light peck on the lips. The blonde gave a better smile against Sasuke's lips that seemed to be contagious, because his lover gave an equal smile.

"I love you."

"And I love you, too."

Naruto pressed into him slightly, making their lips connect again, before rising from the bed and walking out the bedroom door, letting Sasuke return to resting. Or staring at the wall. He walked down the hall quickly, in a little better mood than he was. He nabbed his keys off of the rack. Slipping his feet into a pair of tennis shoes, he nudged his heel into the back and opened the door.

He pulled back slightly as he faced Itachi, who's finger was centimeters away from the doorbell. They both blinked at the sudden meeting but regained the little composure to greet properly.

"What'cha doing here Itachi?" Naruto asked, flipping the keys that he held in his hand. Itachi smiled and rolled his eyes. "I'm here to take Sasuke to see Tsudane today."

Naruto tilted his head slightly and crossed his arms, the keys jingling at the movement. "Why doesn't he just go by himself?" At this Itachi slightly raised his eyebrows in confusion. "Didn't Sasuke talk to you this morning?" He asked suspiciously, shifting his weight to the other foot. Naruto shook his head.

"He was really quiet, actually. He's still in bed." The older of two furrowed his eyebrows and grimaced. He motioned for Naruto to step outside. The blonde followed and closed the door behind him before leaning against it to study his almost brother in-law's expression. He looked slightly scared and concerned.

"I'm actually not surprised he didn't tell you but.." Itachi's hand went straight to his hair, which he wore down today, with the hairtye around his wrist in case he wanted to put it up later.

"Naruto. Sasuke said this is the last time he's visiting Tsudane." Naruto straightened from the leaning against the door and uncrossed his arms to let them fall limply at his sides.

"He said that he's sick of all this disappointment. And I can't blame him. It's wearing on him terribly." Itachi said in a low voice. Naruto had suspected this sometime or another. That Sasuke would finally give up, and Naruto couldn't blame him either. He wouldn't have quit because his determination wouldn't have allowed him to. But this was Sasuke and he couldn't even bring himself to be mad at his lover. Only at himself .

"Thanks Itachi. I had a feeling this would happen." Naruto smiled at Itachi who managed a small smile in return.

"I'm sorry th-"

"No. Don't worry about it." The blonde interrupted. He gave a false grin and a pat on the shoulder to Itachi. "Make sure he's awake, and don't let him forget to call me, okay?" He gave Itachi's shoulder another light pat before walking past him to the red car that sat in the driveway. Naruto opened the car door and slid in and putting the key into the ignition. He waved at Itachi, who gave a small wave back, and started the car. He pulled out and left Itachi's view while he stood on the doorstep.

Itachi frowned and opened the door slowly to his brother's home. He had a bad feeling about today.

He hoped that for once, he would be wrong.

**. B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E .**

Naruto plopped down into his desk chair roughly. He really didn't want to be here today teaching. Which was odd because he adored being at the school. He turned to the photos to his left and smiled slightly, wiping the little dust off of one. He picked it up and held it in front of him. The one of he and Sasuke together. No matter how many times he studied it, there was never any flaws found. Their smiles were perfect, the sunlight was perfect, and there was no one behind the bench to put-off the picture. He started to smile wider until the phone on the stand gave a shrill ring. The ID read Konohamaru's number in the bright green text. He reached to pull the phone off it's hold, but the pedestal came up with it. He frowned when he heard a snicker from the doorway.

"You super glued my phone.." He said in monotone, not looking at the boy in the door. Said boy smiled and nodded. Naruto's frown deepened and he set the phone down.

"No offense 'Maru, but I'm not in the mood." He looked over to Konohamaru who's sheepish grin turned to a sad smile. He closed the phone, ending the other's ring and pocketed it.

"Sorry about that. I was hoping it would cheer you up." Naruto tried a smile, but it turned to a grimace. The assistant frowned and set the coffee that he held in his opposite hand on the desk. The teacher didn't even spare it a glance and sighed.

"You seem more upset than usual. Asking if you were alright would be stupid, but you can tell me what happened." When the blonde didn't raise his eyes he tried again. "Is it Sasuke?" In turn, Naruto nodded and looked up at his disciple.

"Yeah Konohamaru. It is." He started knotting his hands together. Konohamaru nodded his head for him to continue.

"He said that this was the last time he's visiting the old hag. He's sick of all the disappointment. And I hate to say it, but so am I." He wrung out one of his hands from the other and rubbed furiously over his eyes. "It's just not fair. Why _us_?" His voice started to crack as his other hand reached up and he covered his eyes under his palms. The stinging in his eyes gave way and he felt hot tears press his hands.

Konohamaru bit his lip and looked at his idol. Out of all the time he'd ever know him, he never suspected to see them man cry. His happiness was so constant that it seemed that his reserve would never crumble. But there was Naruto, right in front him and sobbing. He couldn't stand even sparing a glance as he whipped around and walked out of the room, a familiar sting in his eyes as well. He half jogged to two doors down across the hall and burst into it.

"Miss Haruno.." The said strawberry haired teacher raised her eyes from the paper at her desk. Her jade eyes immediately look concerned and her eyebrows furrowed. She opened her mouth to speak, but Konohamaru's cracked voice interrupted her.

"I'll tell you the situation later, but right now Naruto needs you." He finally felt the liquid peer over his eyelashes before blinking them into falling. He knew he was acting childish, but he really couldn't stand it. Sakura rose quickly from the Oakwood desk and rushing past the assistant through the door. She turned into the English teacher's room before closing the door behind her.

Sakura fell to her knees next to the chair and met Naruto's squeezing embrace half way. He sobbed and mumbled incoherent words into her shoulder while she hushed him and repeated assuring words in a whisper. They stayed there just repeating words as a mantra while just two doors over, and right across the linoleum floor, Konohamaru leaned against the wall and started a mantra of his own.

"I can do this. I can do this. _Icandothis_."

**. B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E .**

Sasuke sat on the itchy cotton chair of the hospital's lobby. His hands were clasped together while his elbows rested on his knees, letting his arms stretch out in front of him. He sat hunched in his chair vaguely studying the speckled design in the tiles on the ground. Itachi sat next to him with his arms expanding across the chairs on either side of him. He looked up at the ceiling, counting the plates and recounting them again. Three times he got four hundred six. Once he got four hundred three. He corrected himself by counting again. Itachi let his thought wander to his little brother beside him while Sasuke's mind had been far away.

That morning they had left the house a while after Naruto had. Sasuke was taking his time slowly taking his shower and getting dressed. His hair was still wet and stuck to his neck in an unfamiliar fashion when he came to the kitchen where his brother prepared a small breakfast. They spoke very few words over the long period of time. It was an uncomfortable silence that both tried to break often, but failing to start a decent conversation.

Minutes after putting the dishes into the sink and slipping on shoes, they drove to Konoha Hospital. There they sat in the parking lot. Forty two minutes had passed. Itachi should know, he was staring intently at the clock. While Sasuke to his right had been obviously trying to work up the nerve to open the car door and walk through the automatic doors. His hand had shifted to the door a few times, but stopped with a flinch and returned to laying in his lap.

When Sasuke finally rushed his hand to the handle and pushed it open, Itachi wanted to breath a sigh of relief but refrained from drawing attention away from Sasuke and his thoughts. They walked slowly to the self operative doors and met the receptionist at the counter. Itachi had told her the time of their appointment and her manicured nails clicked away at the computer. She gave a nod of approval and asked them to have a seat.

And there they were, twenty minutes later. Itachi had let out a sigh willingly this time which was followed by a click of a door opening. Sasuke blinked and raised his head at the nurse with a clipboard in her hand. She smiled.

"Doctor Tsudane will see you now."

**. B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E .**

"Alright class, it's time for your tests which as you know means complete silence. And Sasuke should be calling me later and since _someone_ super glued my phone to the stand**.." **He looked to Konohamaru who was passing out tests. The assistant looked at him and grinned. "So I have to answer the phone on speaker. Just keep working on your tests." He sat down at his desk again and slid his chair forward.

Naruto pulled out a pen from his 'Number One Teacher!' mug and started grading papers from earlier. One of the girls in the second row, Umori, raised her hand for a question. He briefly raised his head but as Konohamaru passed out the last packet he trotted over to her. She muttered something low and Konohamaru took a quick glance at the teacher before shaking his head and moving back to the front.

He took an eraser off the rack and started to rub away the letters on the white board. The variety of colors and curves disappeared under the thick black material of the eraser. The whole class was deathly silent besides the ticking of the clock and the squeak of a desk or chair shifting. Even when he had tests some of his students were whispering and giggling to each other. But as they grew to know that when Naruto didn't wear a tie that day, it meant that it was his lover's appointments.

Naruto took a quick glance at the clock before turning back to his papers. His hand shook just slightly and he could almost hear his heartbeat in his ear. Needless to say, he was terrified for some reason. It was only about 8:30 and Sasuke wouldn't be done until 9:00. He sighed through his nose and placed the red pen back against the paper to mark an answer wrong.

**. B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E .**

Sasuke was seated on the cool metal table while Tsudane was out of the room. Despite the thin layer of paper and the thin hospital's robe, he didn't find it all that cold. Itachi sat in the plastic seat to Sasuke's left which was right next to the counter where all the check-up supplies laid.

With his leg fidgeting endlessly and his fingers tapping on crossed arms he looked very uneasy, which Sasuke hadn't seen very many times. His brother was always laid back and collected even in a rough situation, his composure was always solid.

But while Itachi looked from Sasuke to the door over and over, he really couldn't help it. He really did have a bad feeling and it was irritating him that Sasuke looked calm. His eyes were directed on the knob of the door, waiting for it to turn and he sat up straight as a board. Sasuke really wasn't calm, infact, he was slightly surprised that Itachi couldn't hear his heartbeat from where he sat just feet away. He could hardly hear his thought over it.

He was debating whether he should actually bother to call Naruto when he was done. Hated talking to Naruto after the appointment, hearing his voice go from chipper to a low sulking tone was a tad heartbreaking. Maybe if he asked nicely Itachi might do it for him. Sasuke looked at his brother where he say with furrowed eyebrows and obviously anxious. Itachi looked up from his spaced stare on the floor and gave his younger brother a reassuring smile. Sasuke gave a small smile back.

With the one time Sasuke wasn't waiting for the doorknob to turn, it seemingly did. His head snapped back to the thick hunk of wood to see Tsudane with a folder in her hands. She gave a very tiny smile, that could pass as a grimace. The blonde doctor was pouring tears down her cheeks. That's where the two brother's attention was. The chocolate brown eyes were glazed and puffy from crying. Sasuke's jaw dropped into an unbelievable frown. His heartbeat had just about stopped. He couldn't hear it in his ears anymore, just the breaths of the room's occupants.

"Sasuke.."

**. B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E .**

Naruto gave the clock another glance. It was 9:12 and he was starting to worry. Normally he wouldn't but the aching feeling that this was the last call from Sasuke after his appointments was wearing on him. The ticks of the clock, the screeches of chairs and Naruto's insistent pen taps against his paper were the only source of sound in the classroom. Konohamaru sat at a smaller student's desk in the corner nearest him also correcting papers. Some of his students had finished the packet and opted for staring at the dark second's hand go past lines and numbers each minute.

He had stopped tapping his pen and turned it around to face the ink towards the paper. He placed it gently on the written paper but immediately dropped it when his phone gave a shrill ring as it's usual tone did.

Everyone stopped writing on their papers and snapped their heads up. It appeared that they had been waiting for this almost as much as Naruto had. The hand that was holding the pen shook violently all of the sudden. He could swear that his whole body was shaking and his heart was going a million miles an hour. The screen read 'Uchiha' and Sasuke's cellular number under it. His hand reached leisurely towards the bold white letters that read 'SPEAKER' and pressed the dark button.

"Hello Sasuke." He tried to sound casual but it came out forced.

"Naruto…" His assumed boyfriend's voice murmured softly. Naruto sadly smiled at the tone that he expected.

"Hey." He paused slightly, contemplating how to ask carefully. "H-How did the appointment go?" Everyone in Naruto's class was leaning forward in their chairs. Konohamaru was staring intently just as well.

A small stutter was heard and then an exhale. Naruto automatically slumped, his whole form contorting into sadness. His eyebrows furrowed and he cleared his throat to rid of the possible choking sound.

"It's okay Sasuke." He tried his best to sound happy but anyone could tell he was trying to hard. The classroom seemed to darken at their teacher's mood. Some of the middle school students were near tears. Konohamaru's jaw dropped slightly and he dropped his pen.

"Don't worry about a thing. We tried and if tha-"

"No Naruto." Said blonde leaned back slightly and frowned. His eyes connected with his desk and his eyes stung for the second time that day. Sasuke was really giving up. On everything. Maybe they would have to resort to adoption, which was fine, but its not really what they wanted.

"If you want, we coul-"

"God. Naruto." They could all hear a sob on the other end of the line. A few girls had felt tears pour down their cheeks watching their teacher fall apart right in front of them.

"You dobe." Naruto could hear a sobbing laughter from his lover and furrowed his eyebrows even more.

"We did it." Naruto gasped as Sasuke's melodious voice filled the speaker.

"Naruto.." He immediately brightened and smiled.

"I'm Pregnant."

**. B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E .**

I kicked foreshadowing's ass.

Been working on this for about 2 days straight. It's 6:30 AM and I haven't gone to bed yet :DD

You know the drill, guys. Reviews, etc. etc.

Flames will be used to be set your houses on fire.

**Remember the A//N at the beginning!** I need baby names!

I'll explain unexplained shite in the next chapter. Like Konohamaru's _Icandothis _mantra. Konohamaru and Itachi are going to be the next step down from main characters.

NINE PAGES, OCH AYE!! I'm so proud of myself. F:

I think just these two chapters are longer than Sapphire…lol..

Loves to you, dah'ling.

**REALLY QUICK SIDE NOTE::**

I had someone review about 2 minutes after i posted this.  
I know it's a tad short but _come on_...  
Please, if you're not even going to bother reading it, don't reveiw it.

Oh and, if you look at the reveiws.,visit the SUPERNOTE in my profile. Fun shit right thar.


	3. Perfect

I. Am. So. Sorry.

D:

I have baby names, too!

Thank you EVERYONE who reviewed and gave lovely suggestions.

:is all nervous:

Here's an update!

:hides:

**. B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E .**

**When all your dreams come true**

"_I'm pregnant"_

"Yes! Oh holy Mary mother of _GOD! _YES!" Naruto screamed, jumped, hollered and laughed all at the same time. At the sudden moment his bones felt like they were set on automatic. He jittered with happiness and he couldn't even keep still. Overall, he could hear a melodious laugh of his lover over the line. Everyone gave a quick breathy release of relief.

"Shit! I'm gonna be a dad! Me! Dad! An-and you too, Sasuke!" He put his hands through his hair quickly and he realized the grin was starting to cramp his jaw. But he couldn't stop wiggling in his place. Sasuke laughed again and agreed fully.

"Well I'm on my home Naruto, so I'll see you-"

"Home!" Naruto interrupted quickly, "I'm going home, too! I'll be there!" He looked around quickly until his eyes caught Konohamaru and he grinned. "Kid. Can you take over for me?" Naruto started jumping in place again., obvious excitement rocking his legs. Konohamaru pointed to himself in shock and nodded slowly. He always wanted to teach, really. He was in shock. Too many good things were happening at the same time. There wasn't a sign of sadness is sight. A grin was pasted on every student in the classroom.

"Alright Sasu. I'll meet you at home? Alright?" He asked anxiously. Sasuke agreed and exchanged their goodbyes. Naruto immediately started jumping in his place again. He mumbled to screamed as he gathered his things for his quick leave. Gathering his bag and papers he quickly jet through the classroom door, wishing Konohamaru luck.

He ripped out of door and went straight across the hall to Sakura's classroom. She was in the middle of reading a passage from a book in her hand and writing something relevant to it on the whiteboard. When the door banged open she jumped, squeaked and dropped the dry-erase marker all at the same time, which also startled a few of her students who were silently working.

"Sakura! Sakura!" He ran and grabbed her shoulders and started to shake her furiously.

"Wh-What Narut-to!" Her words came out jumbled as she couldn't quite keep her head still with all the shaking. Naruto quickly stopped and looked at her with giant grin.

"It's Sasuke! We did it Sakura! I'm gonna be a daddy! Can you believe it?!" He clasped her shoulders and gave a small quick shake again. She seemed to take a moment to register this, but when she did she let out an inhumanely happy scream and jumped up and down with Naruto, urging him to do the same.

"Finally! My god. I'm so happy for you Naruto!" He thanked her quickly and nodded. Sakura quickly gasped and her eyes glittered. "Does this mean I'm an auntie? Have you thought of names yet? Do you have baby supplies? Can you-" Naruto cut her off with a quick frantic wave.

"We'll talk later Sakura. I have to get home to Sasuke!" He gave her a very quick hug which she returned the best she could and he zoomed out the door. She couldn't stop smiling the rest of the day. Her students were left in a confusion, but didn't quite care as much when she announced that there was no homework.

**. B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E .**

Sasuke sat on the plush red couch in their living room, anxious to the point of fidgeting. He kept biting his lip quickly and smiling. Often he would stand up and start pacing in small circles before sitting down and fidgeting again. Itachi was in the kitchen chopping tomatoes and honeydew for he and Sasuke. He was always switching between a light smile and a grin every time he thought of his little brother's bundle of joy.

He gently put the slices of tomatoes on a small plate. He chuckled at the thought of wanting to put them in the shape of a smiley face and brushed it off. He carried the plate and a small cereal bowl of honeydew to the den and sat next to Sasuke. He put both of the snacks on the small coffee table in front of them.

"Little brother. Your quite antsy. Try to be a little calmer." Itachi chuckled and crabbed a small cube of honeydew from his bowl. He placed half of it in his mouth and bit down while Sasuke reached for the plate of tomatoes. He stopped and smiled before it reached his lips and looked to the older Uchiha.

"You can't say you weren't as excited as I am. I just can't wait 'til he gets home." He finally shoved the fruit in his mouth and savored it like a god's nectar. Itachi let out a small laugh and nodded.

"I was. I was so excited, I jumped on you, remember?" He laughed again and ate another piece of the green colored fruit. Of course Sasuke remembered. He had almost broken his wrist when his older brother suddenly jumped on him with not even an utter of a warning. Let alone he could hardly understand the poor man.

"I have to admit, I am being a little hypocritical aren't I? But never the less, being calm is what you really need to work on Sasuke. I know you." Sasuke nodded and crossed his legs on the couch. He turned his body towards his brother and stuck the plate of tomatoes in his lap.

"Itachi, what was it like?" Sasuke asked suddenly. It slightly caught Itachi off guard before he smiled and turned his attention to his little brother, sitting the same way he was with the bowl of fruit in his lap.

"Well, it wasn't easy. At first it was exciting of course. I was going to be a mom and I wanted her to be there right then. But being patient was the worst process of the whole nine months. But it's all worth it in the end." He placed a piece of honeydew in his mouth and began to talk around it.

"But after a while the morning sickness kicked in. It wasn't really all _that_bad. Just like a bad case of flu, y'know?" He swallowed the food in his mouth before continuing. "After that the mood swings kicked in and I swear, I felt so bad for Kakashi. Even to this day I feel bad for making him handle me like that." Itachi shook his head twice and chuckled lightly.

"Handle you? What's so hard about that?" The younger of the two asked before indulging in the plate of fruits again.

"They were horrendous, Sasuke. I would go from the happiest person on the world to terribly suicidal in a matter of seconds. If I was ever mad I was down right cruel and degrading." Itachi shook his head again and this time sighed. Sasuke let out a low whistle and slightly set a hand to rest on his stomach. He wished that his imagination was broad enough to be able too feel what it would be like to have the full living organism inside of him.

"And that's not even the worst part. The cravings you might get will be fascinating." Itachi suddenly continued dragging his little brother from his thoughts. "At the time I adored it, but I will never look at sidewalk chalk the same way again." He grimaced and shuddered slightly. "I don't even remember how I got it. I think it was in supply closet, but, Kakashi had to hide it somewhere after that episode.." Itachi stuck out his tongue and made a 'plehk' sound while Sasuke laughed at his shenanigans.

"But in a way it was great because Kakashi was there for me every time I needed something." Itachi suddenly looked very hard at Sasuke. "And I know you don't like accepting help from others, but you really need to let Naruto help you, Sasuke. It's what he's there for and it's going to be instinct even if it's just the smallest things. You need to let him help you." The oldest Uchiha scolded. Sasuke's upper lip twitched slightly at the thought of being helped with _everything_. It was worth it at least and he was sure to get used to it. He silently urged him to continue.

"After that its mostly back pains and other things. But no matter what, you have to wait and cherish that one moment when your baby kicks for the first time." Itachi seemed to smile at the memory. "It was the best part and every time she kicked it reminded me of how much I truly wanted that baby." He shook his head lightly and smiled a bit wider as he went in-depth with the memory in his own mind. In a moment he was back on his train of thought and made eye contact with his little brother again.

"I really am happy for you Sasuke." Itachi muttered out in a low voice. It was the first time he really said it and it made Sasuke's heart bubble in a nauseously good way. He went to open his mouth to say something but the front door busted open. It swung so fast that it made a sickening 'thunk' and a rattle on the other wall, obviously doing some sort of damage. Sasuke spared himself the thought of a hole in his precious wall and whipped his head around to look towards the entrance. His eyes met a frenzied pair of deep sky blue orbs and he sprung from his couch to meet Naruto in a grasping hug. They both laughed until tears sprung at the corners of their eyes.

"I can't even believe it.." The blond whispered and leaned his head against his lover's. His eyes closed and he hummed contently. "It feels like it hasn't even sunken in yet."

"I know. I know. But you're gonna be a dad now." Sasuke whispered back. His arms were under Naruto's and joined in the middle of his shoulders while Naruto gently had his hands placed on each side of Sasuke's face.

"And technically, you're going to be a mom." Naruto grinned and they both laughed again.

Nearest to them on the red couch was Itachi with a rare sincere smile gracing his face. His heart bubbled with happiness for his brother and he couldn't even imagine if he felt this happy, how his brother felt right now. Itachi's thought stumbled on to his own daughter and his husband and the cheer rose another octave. He got up from the couch, leaving the two to themselves, and took his cell phone from the counter and hit the speed dial.

"_Hello, love."_

"I wish you would greet me as if you didn't have caller I.D." Itachi heard a chuckle from the other end of the line.

"_I'm sorry. But I think I know why you called. How did everything go?"_

"They did it Kakashi. They finally did it." Itachi smiled a bit wider while his husband let out a laugh of glee.

"_They really did?! That's fantastic! I'll be over right away." _Itachi nodded but then approved before clicking his tongue.

"And Kakashi? Would you mind bringing Kichi, too?" He smiled again at the thought of his daughter. He heard a car door and a beeping from Kakashi before he heard the door close and the car start.

"_Of course, love. I'll be there soon."_

"Thank you." They both hung up without saying goodbye. The older Uchiha leaned against the counter and sighed. Out of all the best moments in his life he could reflect on this as one of them. He was going to be an uncle. His brother was going to be a mom.

Back in the den the two were seated on the couch while Naruto talked animatedly about things that they would need and who they were going to tell. Sasuke nodded and listened while he added his two sense in every once and a while. They couldn't help but realize that all they're dreams were coming true right then and there. And everything was.. perfect.

**. B I R D S . A N D . B E E S . D O N T . M A K E . S E N S E .**

Why do I feel that this chapter sucks?

Oh. Maybe because it does.

And it's WAY shorter than the last one.

So cheesy. Want some macaroni with that? 8D

**ARBEZ, bitch.**

PS.

Summer's coming up.

Means that I'll update more than once a freaking year.

:slaps self:


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